Did you ever realize how much your body loves you? I mean it’s always trying to keep you alive. That’s all your body has to live for. Your body is making sure you breathe while you sleep, stopping cuts from bleeding, fixing broken bones, finding ways to beat the illnesses that might get you. Your body literally loves you so much. It’s time you start loving your body back.
omg puppy put ur seatbelt on it’s so unsafe for ur tiny lil body to not have a seatbelt on oh ur so precious i love u
Cocoon and Evolved Metallic Mechanitis Butterfly Chrysalis from Costa Rica
you could really fuck with your baby if you get something embarrassing tattooed on the top of their head when they’re born and don’t tell them then they go bald 50 years later like what the fuck
never become a parent
So this hot substitute logged into netflix and I wrote down the email with which he did it and used a service (it cost like $2) to find all other accounts connected to that email and I found his (private) twitter so I made a fake twitter of a hot girl and added a bunch of tweets over the course of a month to make it look legit and then I requested to follow him and he let me and he is the most goddamn boring person in the world
you need to be arrested
Some people just know how to do birthday cards.
birthday cards against humanity